Parenting For Dummies

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Every person is unique in what their goals might be, but here are some considerations and tips to ensure you get started on the right foot: Don’t say, Do that one more time and you’ll regret it. It sounds nice because it gives you an out; you’re not bound to do anything linked to that threat. But it’s better if you say instead, If you choose to do that one more time, then I’m not allowing AJ to spend the night tonight. Then if the child chooses to do the dastardly deed one more time, your follow-through is to say, You chose to do (whatever). Because you made that choice, AJ doesn’t get to spend the night. Then follow through by not allowing AJ to spend the night.

Having a baby is an incredible experience, and the ultimate responsibility! Parenting is a job that you start with no training at all – and friends and family always seem to be the first to tell you how best to bring up your children. But there's no sure-fire formula for raising kids. Maybe that's because every child, like every parent, is an individual, and no two parent-child relationships are ever the same. So, you can give up any notions of being a perfect parent. But, you can learn to keep the big mistakes to a minimum and make the parenting experience easier and more rewarding for your children and yourself. Which is where this book comes in. If your children are your friends, they’re more likely to open up to you with their problems and concerns about school, peer pressure, or other things that bother them. Likewise, you’ll be more approachable when your kids look to you not only as a parent but also a friend. Introducing the Five Basic Parenting SkillsCommunication is the key to your relationship with your children, and this little section is just the tip of the iceberg. Refer to Chapter 23, Communicating with Your Child, and read it carefully. Good communication is the foundation of a good relationship. ParentsApproved Each year, more than 4 million babies are born in the United States-and the first year of a baby's life is a joyous, challenging, and sometimes overwhelming time. Yo ur Baby's First Year For Dummies serves as a complete guide for baby's first twelve months, from what to do when arriving home from the hospital to handling feeding, bathing, and sleeping routines to providing the right stimuli for optimal progress. I can and will find a responsible babysitter so that I can have some one-on-one adult time once in a while. Your kids will do anything they can to get your attention. Even if that means negative attention. If you don’t spend time with your children and give them positive attention, they’ll do whatever it takes to get your attention. If they find that pouring water on the floor is what it takes to get you to spend time with them, they’ll do it. As small children, these acts are innocent enough. But as your children get older, they’ll do dangerous things, like drugs and alcohol. Finding Your Sense of Humor in the Lost and Found If you’re calm, relaxed, and don’t overreact to broken dishes and other such events, your children are likely to be calm and relaxed. On the other hand, if you’re nervous and tense, your children are likely to be nervous and tense.

So, the object of the game is discovering how to perfect your parenting and relationship skills. To do that you must understand three basic things: Whether your kids attend public schools or are schooled in your home, you’ll need to help them with their homework and other educational needs. Take the time to explain how things work, and let your children help you cook and clean, grow some flowers. This is all part of education. WordsOfWisdom Another book that I suggest that you read is called The Emotional Incest Syndrome, What to Do When a Parent’s Love Rules Your Life, by Dr. Patricia Love. I admit that the title, to me at least, is a tad scary. But the reason that I suggest this book is to show you what to avoid. Too much of a friend can be defined as a parent who shares confidential information with a child or makes the child think of himself and that parent as best friends. Becoming too much of a friend leads a child to believe that he must help you to take care of your needs instead of you enabling him to grow and take care of his own needs. The friend versus parent conflict isn’t all doom and gloom because good parents can and do make things fun, the way that a good friend does. But beware of bad but not-so-obvious habits that you don’t want to develop, such as invalidating a child with a problem, which you probably learned from your parents. Examples include telling a child to stop whining because nothing really is wrong with him or telling him to get up because he isn’t really hurt. Just don’t babble: Sweetheart, please don’t touch the apples. If you touch the pretty red apples, they may all fall on the ground causing your dear, sweet mother an enormous amount of embarrassment. What he hears is: Sweetheart, blah apples blah blah. . . .The Egyptians knew that to make the whole pyramid concept work, they had to start with a strong, solid base. This base had to be all-encompassing and broad enough to handle the weight of everything that went on top of it. Making a good pyramid took a long time. Many attempts at building pyramids failed, but those aren’t the structures that you see in pictures or get to tour.

Five basic skills are involved in The Parenting Game. When you master these skills, you should be able to handle most situations that arise. The five basic skills are Stop before you react to anything and take a deep breath. Deep breathing (or maybe it’s just stopping and letting your brain work for a minute) helps you realize that whatever you’re looking at isn’t really that awful. You may even get so mad that you have to excuse yourself and tell your children that you’re upset and you’ll have to discuss the situation later when you’ve had time to cool down. Make sure you resolve the situation that day. If you let too much time go by, your kids will have forgotten the whole thing. Concern for your children is good. But don’t be so protective of your children that you forget how fun kids can be. Laughing is great. It makes you feel good, it relieves stress, and it makes life a lot more fun. Is There an End to this Game? The following guidelines can help you decide when and where to introduce your child to the great outdoors, but please remember that the only firm guide is each child's particular personality and physical condition. Whatever the activity, you must let them pace themselves.Toddler: Between the ages of 2 and 4, children are still getting used to the idea of being on two points of balance and not four. Short hikes between half a mile and 2 miles are ideal as long as the terrain is flat and secure to walk on. Take regular walks in a neighborhood park to get a feel for your child's attention span. Expect a focused attention span of around 10 minutes for younger children and up to 30 minutes for older children. Ages 14-18: Distances up to 12 miles become reasonable in this age group. Terrain choices and goal setting can become more challenging, but the axiom remains the same: Any choice must be a group choice, or the parent risks making the children feel dragged along. How do you get to the point where crying babies, poopy diapers that have overflowed onto your nice white Battenburg bedspread, being late, and a toddler who seems to be dragging his feet don’t bother you any more? These are the realities of kids, so how do you work with their reality so they don’t drive you crazy? Patience means: Hover. Toddlers and some preschoolers are more mobile and independent than infants. You can no longer hold onto them and meet all their needs. But their newfound mobility and independence can also be their undoing. They are vulnerable to all sorts of hazards, from falling and hitting their head to walking blindly through a busy parking lot. They need you to hover and to intervene when their small adventures put them in harm’s way. to know what the months ahead hold; you have given birth and need advice from a book that doesn't talk down to you or make you feel as though there's something wrong with you (because there's not) if you're having a hard time making the adjustment to parenthood.

Teaching your child how to be his own person requires you to understand what that means. So, you must enable your child to be his own person, have his own ideas, recognize and respect the fact that your and his ideas can be different. Yes, a child can have his own ideas about life. Although those ideas may differ from what you think or what you know to be true, they nevertheless are still his ideas. Your baby’s first year is a time of wonder, joy, and uncertainty. You’ll learn not to panic every time your baby cries, but there are times when your bundle of joy needs a doctor’s attention right away.Ages 10-13: Children in this age range are becoming increasingly conditioned physically. Emotionally, they are more likely to be able to handle moderately challenging situations, but they are also more likely to question the worth of anything extremely difficult. Hikes up to 10 miles are possible as long as the terrain is not too hilly or mountainous. Children in this age group thrive on being the leader — diplomatic and judicious support from parents is key. Menu planning, route finding, cooking, and camp setup are reasonable tasks to assign to kids at this age, but be careful that they do not take on too much and begin to feel like all they are doing is working. Chapter 6, Behavior Management, discusses how rewarding good behavior, constant praise, plenty of hugs and kisses, and organized play can keep your child out of mischief. WARNING: The perils of negative attention